Of Love and Other Lies.

Good morning.

I just like to wonder and ask myself; when my time comes and I die quietly in my sleep, would anyone notice?

I mean, I wonder who exactly on this planet called earth I'm important to. I wonder who really does care about me/who I really care about.

I know some truths about myself; some uncomfortable things that I know would make the same people who tell me they love me daily run for the hills.

I'm not uncomfortable with said truths. Far from it...they are mine. I'm good with them. I just know that they (people) would be.

And you know what the funniest part is?

The same people who I know would be uncomfortable with my truths have theirs too. In a lot of cases - a lot worse than mine.

So what are we talking about? I think life would be more interesting if we could all be real for a moment. Be honest with ourselves. But that's not gonna happen. So I don't care.

What I'm talking about is this: It's the ones you say you love you hurt the most and vice versa - simply because you've let them in and put them somewhere you have not allowed anyone else be. So automatically, because you hold them there you expect them to hold you dear. But we forget that we choose who we love. WE CANNOT CHOOSE THE ONES WHO LOVE US.

Unfortunate but true.


So why am I rambling? I just believe that sometimes; or rather ALL the time truth is better. Because more often that not; people have no idea what they mean when they say all the stuff they say. And I think that's really sad.

A 'I hate you' does me more good than a confused 'I love you'...because I understand clearly what 'I hate you' means or might mean; and I also want to believe that whoever tells you they hate you know what they're saying. 'Love' on the other hand has been so abused that I'm sure even the words themselves have no idea what they mean. I mean.

Now don't get it confused; I'm fully aware that in the midst of all the lies and confusion and stuff there are some few and rare people who really and genuinely care for you; just like I genuinely care for some people - what I need you to understand is...those people won't tell you they love you all the time. In fact, they might never say it to you.

They would just allow their actions speak for them, because they know too that words are...

I'm just rambling.

The NaijaStories Anthology (A book to own)

In case y'all missed that memo - I have become a published author. That's right!

In the published Naija Stories Anthology - me and twenty nine other talented writers massage your palate with incredibly edible stories of Nigeria as we see it. Read the official press release below:

NAIJA STORIES is the leading community for Nigerian writers and book lovers, combining elements of a writing critique website and a social networking site. I came across this community of Nigerian writers early this year and I am delighted to say that the stories and articles published on this site has imparted knowledge and improved my vocabulary and writing skills. When i decided to start a blog, i knew i loved to write and wanted to motivate people with my articles which is going on pretty well; but since I became a member of this community, writing has never been more fun and more interesting. It's like you have a team and family where you belong and have people review your work and help you improve everyday.

Of Tears and Kisses, Heroes and Villains is Volume 1 of the ‘Best of NaijaStories’ series. The 30 stories featured in this anthology were all originally published on naijastories.com between March 2010 and March 2011. This is a book you will love to have as a Nigerian because it features our everyday life, precepts fom our environment, culture, government and everything you can think of about Naija.

Copy and paste the link to find out more: http://www.naijastories.com/2012/03/the-naijastories-anthology-goes-on-sale-launches-march-27/

If you live in Nigeria and want the book delivered in PDF to your inbox, please contact admin@naijastories.com for payment details (via Zenith Bank and GTBank).

REVIEWS - READ what people have to say about this book
These are stories about us or about our neighbours or something we’ve encountered in the news. They are what our friends tell us, their pain and joy, their passion and rage, their yearning and their cry against injustice. I enjoyed lots of the stories not just because of their simplicity and brevity but also for freshness they bring to storytelling and public discourse. – Sylva Nze Ifedigbo. (Author, The Funeral Did Not End)

Here we are, with our abortions, our bereavement, our lust, our petty showdowns, our pederasts, our In-Law wahala, our problems chatting up girls in the diaspora, our memories of childhood, our fights, our incest, our love, our examination stress, our metafictional accounts, our encounters with university campus cults, our broken families, our… well, you get the idea. We rob banks, but we also eat salty beans to show our children we love them. – Tade Thompson (Writer/Editor)

These short stories are not constrained by the need to attain fame. They all are, first of all, good works written with sharp perspectives that are related to various societal issues. There is a unique allure in every story. They have not been sifted through a Western colander. Support this anthology and show that there is a worthiness of effort in putting it together. This anthology is indeed the birth of writers that have newly been empowered. Go get a copy for yourself. – Joseph Omotayo (Blogger/Book Critic)


Please get your copies and send your reviews!

We're Moving!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good Morning!

I just wanted to tell you guys...

Good Morning!

I swear it feels like a really great year - we are going to do some incredible things together. God willing.

Its funny trying new things - and even though the experience might sometimes be rough...I always see new challenges as another opportunity to grow.

Imagine me saying 'good morning' at after ten...

GOOD MORNIKT!!!!!!!

Romantic Writers of West Africa December Book Bonanza

Just so you know, I am a member of the above association.

Yes I know; isn't it...wonderful?!

Anyways, these wonderful people have come together to give you; the reader an incredible Christmas package - one you will not forget in a hurry.

How to get involved? Just click on the link and follow the instructions!!!!

http://rwowa.wordpress.com/2011/12/01/december-book-bonanza/

We await you!!!!!

DMX

I have to be honest. I love DMX.

And I'm not saying 'no homo'. Make whatever you will of that.

Of course, you know I mean DMX the rapper. His distinct voice, that dog like growl, the way he puts his opinions down...those are a bit of the things that make him unique.

Also...let's not forget the former aptitude for jail term and legal trouble...having spent most of the last five years or so (I think) going from one jail into another. But that's not why I'm writing this.

A lot of people describe DMX as 'confused' or 'battled by demons (aren't we all)' and a few other colorful monikers over the years...due to his lyrics...album art and even aggresive nature. And while I agree with some of the tags, I feel like people miss the point.

My personal reason why DMX remains one of my top 5 rappers dead or live is because he's so introspective....thoughtful and lucid.

Anyone who knows me and reads this blog would know those are; at least, qualities we share.

A lot of DMX's lines, songs and lyrics inspire me, but probably my greatest reference to his work would be a line in the seventh track on his first album...It's Dark and Hell Is Hot - the track titled 'Let Me Fly'.

The lyrics I'm talking go thus:

be like what of his birth
Was a miscarriage and I never existed
Have I given something that have been taken away you
would of missed it
Didn't know, did I persisted?
It was the call of the wild
I'm here to say what's in my heart, and you call it a style
Don't put it in the cage, don't mistreat it
You say you hunger for knowledge, here it is eat it
Another song completed is another thought captured


I keep thinking; mostly of those lines "What if his birth/was a miscarriage/and he never existed/has he given something that if taken away/you'd have missed it/"

Has he?

Have I?

Ultimately I believe in God; which means I believe in a grand design and all that stuff.

Which means I am concerned with my significance; if any.

Do I have any purpose? Am I fulfilling my purpose?

If I did not exist; would you miss me?

IF YOU did not exist; would anyone miss you?

Some Big Mac/KFC largest-bucket size food for thought...

Sunday.

Th.ing is...I'm just sitting here wondering what to write.

No. That's not right.

I'm sitting here writing. I'm just wondering if what I'm writing is something you would like to read.
As much as this is some kind of diary for me, I must also realize that I can't just put everything out there. Things like this/that have a way of coming back to take a huge bite out of one's behind.

So...what am I rambling about now?

I don't know. I feel like I'm at a crossroads...which is usually the state of things with me. It's strange that sometimes I see where I'm headed so clearly...and then sometimes I see NOTHING. I start to wonder if I know what I'm doing...I start feeling these feelings of inadequacy - feelings of self-doubt and so on.

I start to ask myself - what if I'm wrong?

Honest Love Letter

Dear Owner,
I'm so lucky I'm your BlackBerry!

You hold me with both hands as gently as you can.

You ensure that I am always with you.

If I fall you are always afraid of me hurting myself. I always have your undivided attention, you get upset if others disturb our time together.

You never forget me in a taxi & you won't give me to just anyone unlike my old friends Nokia, Sony and Samsung that you would proudly just hand over.

When you eat, I'm beside you. When you're on the toilet seat, I'm with you. When you're sleeping, my head is by your pillow.

When I scream, you rush and pick me like an egg.

When I feel low, you make every effort to recharge my battery. When I am hungry, you fill me with airtime. You buy me all sorts of clothes to cover my precious skin. And if I make you feel like a cowboy you strap me to your waist or jeans.

Every month you ensure that you set aside the money, to buy me bundles (of love).

You upgraded to me from my friends Nokia, Sony and Samsung; and then upgraded me to a Curve, Bold & Torch.

You rush home from work and spend quality time with me; not really bothered to make a conversation with those at home.

You sit up with me for hours and smile at me, yet I have no human emotions; sometimes I make you laugh; people think you are mad. I watch your wife/hubby or your lovers who envy our time together.

But dear, I appeal to you.

Your life is wasted because of me. Take some time, leave me aside and sort out issues that are important to you because I may love you as much as you do love me but I'm just a blackberry, nothing more!.

Kind Pings,
Your BlackBerry.

Copied from Raymond Elenwoke's FB status